Questions & Answers

I wrote "Don't Gamble..." to assist people with overcoming obstacles and achieving their goals. However, in my opinion, that's where the similarities between most "self-help" books and my book end. I've seen people make the same mistakes I've made, and I figured there might be some sort of pattern. My book will resonate with anyone who's wondered why they keep running into obstacles on their path to enjoyment. Everyone encounters obstacles, but understanding how and why these things keep getting in the way better prepares you to deal with them. 

The book chronicles my journey through what turned out to be a tough, but necessary life transformation from "was" to "is." I discuss many personal experiences. It was important for me to incorporate a high degree of realism, to show the reader that I wrote it from an authentic place. Life isn't always perfect, and admittedly, mine felt like a never-ending train wreck, until I discovered that it wasn't a trainwreck, at all. 

Obstacles and challenges can often make it difficult to see the finish line. However, with a shift in your thinking, it's possible to bring that finish line into focus and make the journey getting to it much easier. 

It's never too early (or late) to make an investment in yourself, or in someone you know who may be struggling. My book is a wonderful asset for your figurative portfolio, and the potential return on the investment is limitless! 

The most effective way for the reader to get the most out of their reading my book is to first clear their mind of what they believe, open the book, and start reading it. An important thing I've learned from experience is, you can't grasp an alternate point of view, if you go into the discussion determined to remain exactly the way you currently are. 

I spent years being angry and resentful towards the world, and I made little progress. A simple shift in mindset changed all of that. My goal with my book is to show the reader how simple making that shift really is.

First, I don't refer to my book as "self-help," though it certainly falls into that category. I refer to it as "self-development" or "self-investment" because it focuses on unlocking and developing traits a person already possesses. What makes my book different from the others is the degree of realism, meaning, the majority of the scenarios contained in the book are personal experiences. I believe if the reader can see someone who's gone through similar experiences as they have, the written words have a greater impact.

With this type of book, many people tend to look for scientific methods or philosophies for addressing common issues. There's certainly nothing wrong with science, but to me, plain-old common sense can get the job done just as, if not more effectively. 

In an ideal world, a reader will begin reading my book and won't be able to put it down. I want every reader of my book to get to the bottom of a page, and start wondering to themselves, "What in the world is Kevin going to say next? I have to read the next page!"

Absolutely! There are takeaways for anyone who reads it. However, the key to benefiting is being ready to receive the information as it's written. The actions and behaviors I discuss in the book have been displayed by many people (including myself) on multiple occasions. I suspect most people have seen or experienced them, at some point.

I've stated on several occasions, every reader will either use the information in the book themselves, or they'll know someone who needs it, and I confidently stand by that statement. The reader may not agree with every idea or opinion, and that isn't, nor has ever been my intent. My intent is to get each reader to agree with at least one idea or opinion.

One of my favorite lines in the book is in the first chapter: "Improvement always begins with an idea, but is advanced or defeated by an attitude." My hope is the book motivates each reader to develop what I refer to as an "Inside Out Mentality," and start looking for solutions within themselves, first. Generally, when things go wrong, we tend to look for outside causes, which is perfectly fine, as long as you've made sure YOU are okay, first! I've discovered that in many cases, the solution to overcoming an obstacle is much closer than many people are willing to look.

My life experiences were the influences for much of the content in the book. Life wasn't going as I'd planned, and I always felt there was a more effective way of getting where I wanted to be. My problem was I was too proud (that's code for "hard-headed") to ask for help on my own. I'd rather keep banging my head against the wall, expecting the wall to move out of my way. 

As painful as it was, and with some effective coaching from some wonderful mentors, I was forced to take an honest look at my actions and behavior, and it prompted a need for some adjustments. It wasn't easy to do (or accept), but necessary. I hope by explaining what I went through, it simplifies the journey for somebody else.

If my book can inspire one reader to make positive adjustments in their life, and they benefit from something I've written, it has accomplished its intended task. Of course, the more readers it can inspire, the better.

One of the hardest tasks to accomplish is convincing a person to consider another way of thinking, when they're convinced their current way is working. No one wants to face the possibility that their thinking may be flawed. I was no exception. I had to learn to get out of my own way, and accept the unpleasant fact that I wasn't right all the time, and wasn't right about a number of things I was doing in my life.

I think the challenge for most readers will be getting through the first two chapters. They were designed for self-reflection, which is not always easy to do. Readers will need to be comfortable with the possibility of being made uncomfortable, because some of the content may make them feel that way. They must also be willing to open themselves to a different perspective. Beliefs hold a lot of weight in a person's head, but are they correct? Maybe, maybe not, but looking at things from another point of view may make the pieces of the puzzle finally fit together.

The thing to remember is improvement can be painful, because of what you find may be necessary to achieve it. What may be necessary is making a decision, or taking an action you may not like, or even want to do, but unless you do it, the situation isn't going to change!

My goal with writing the book was to write it in a way that the reader wouldn't feel like they're reading a book. They would feel like I'm having a conversation with them. I felt it was important to add the aspect of realism, because without it, credibility is lost. By highlighting many of my own experiences, the reader sees a person who has gone through a number of obstacles designed to defeat them, and found ways to overcome them. 

The reader should expect to go through a wide range of emotions while reading the book. They should also expect a lot of raw realism, because the topics in the book aren't sugar-coated! They may be tough for some people to read, but the intent is to assist in enhancing their life for the better. I'm confident that every reader will read at least one thing in this book that makes them say, "I know exactly who could use this information!" or quite possibly, "I needed that."

Improvement occurs by getting beyond the boundaries of the comfort zone, and my book will test those boundaries. The turnaround didn't begin for me, until I learned how to do that. Deciding to take the first step was the hardest, but deciding to take that first step was one of the best decisions I've made!

Yes. I was selected to be a featured author in several anthologies. "Unknown Battlefields: The Footsteps of a Soldier," "The War Within: Before, During and After the Battlefield," and "Our Journey from Boys to Men." 

The first two are collections of pieces written by U.S. Armed Forces members, and/or their family members. It gives the reader an in-depth look at the triumphs and struggles service members endure, in and out of uniform. If you've ever wonder what goes on in the head of a service member, this is the book you need to read. My contribution was a story of how I have to deal with a racially charged incident while I was in the Air Force. I think it will leave many people with their jaw in the floor.  

The third one is a collection of lessons several men share, to show what it took for them to become men. The stories are uplifting and inspiring.

I also have several ideas swirling in my head, so you never know what I'll come up with next.